Beyond Mars and Venus

I’m tired of all the talk about the conflict and differences between men and women.  God  made us  for each other.  There must be a reason that He made us the way we are.  We need to stop complaining about our differences and put our energy into discoverIng the love and unity that God intended for us.

How do we explain the problems that men and women,  husbands and wives have in their relationships?  Some say that men and women are from different planets. Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. But Mars and Venus (the planets) have a  common center.

They may have different orbits, but they both revolve around the Sun.  The Sun is larger than either of them, or both of them put together.  Its tremendous gravitational pull keeps them in their respective orbits.  Even though those orbits vary, they have a balanced relationship, based on their common orbital center.  The Sun is the basis for their relationship to each other.  We have to go beyond Mars and Venus.

Unlike the planets Mars and Venus, many couples don’t have a common center.  They may have come together with their romantic attraction for each other as their center, orbiting around each other.  This limited gravitational force can’t isn’t stable enough by itself to maintain their relationshi. It can quickly get off-balance and become wobbly.

One partner will inevitably begin to exert a stronger pull than the other.  The balance shifts.  One becomes  selfish or demanding, the other needy or codependent.  This imbalance will put increasing strain on their orbit around each other until they break apart or crash into each other with devastating consequences.

To bring balance and harmony into a relationship they need to have a common center, a purpose greater than either of them.  This has to be more than raising the kids or buying a house.  Smaller purposes can fade away. Kids grow up and leave for college.  You’ve bought your dream house.  Now what? Where has your center gone?

Couples need an eternal center, a higher purpose that won’t fade with time.  They need something that is absolute and unchanging, larger than either of them or both together. God is that unchanging absolute center.  God’s love is the harmonizing influence that can keep their unique orbits in balance.  Each partner needs to cultivate a relationship with God.

Eachperson  was created by God as His beloved child.  As they grew, He had great hopes and expectations for them, just as our parents had for us, and we have for our kids.  He created both of them with a greater purpose with the highest expectations for their success and happiness.  Best of all, His highest purpose is the greatest love.

The most fascinating thing is that men and women were created for each other.  Man was made for woman and woman made for man. God made them  so they fit together physically, like a hand in a glove.

The [bible] verse “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them” ^{(Gen. 1:27)} supports the idea that God, has dual characteristics of yang and yin in perfect harmony.  -Exposition of the Divine Principle

If God’s yang and yin (masculine and feminine essences) are in perfect harmony, and men and women are created in His/Her image,don’t you think that He also created men and women to fit together harmoniously, not just physically, but emotionally, mentally and spiritually?

I suspect that we will find the answers when we start looking for our higher purpose together.  As we serve this higher purpose as a holy team, we may discover that we were wonderfully and miraculously made.

What do you think?  Are men and women made for each other?  What is our higher purpose?  Do you have a higher purpose?

Have a Heart – Creation 4.2

Notes for Divine Principle Lecture at Boost!, August 28, 2011

And one of the scribes came, and heard them questioning together, and knowing that he had answered them well, asked him, What commandment is the first of all? Jesus answered, The first is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God, the Lord is one: and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength. The second is this, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these. -Mark 12:28-31 English Standard Version (ESV)
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What should we do to live up to this commandment?

Why is this the first commandment?

The Principle of Creation can help us understand how to live up to God’s expectations as expressed here.

Principle of Creation, Section 4.2 Original Emotion, Intellect and Will; and Original Beauty, Truth and Goodness

The human mind has three faculties: emotion, intellect and will. The human body acts in response to the commands of the mind. When the body responds to the mind’s emotion, intellect and will, its actions pursue the values of beauty, truth and goodness respectively.

God is the subject partner to the human mind; hence, He is also the subject partner to human emotion, intellect and will.

Desiring to realize his original value, a person responds to the perfect emotion, perfect intellect and perfect will of God through his mind, and acts accordingly through his body. Thus, he manifests the values of original beauty, original truth and original goodness.
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When God created Adam & Eve, He invested His original intellect, original, emotion and original will in them, and through them into us. God’s hope was that His children would grow up to fully embody His character. Due to the fall of man described in Genesis, Adam and Eve were never able to mature to the point where they could fully embody God’s character.

We inherited this imperfection from them, along with all the rest of humanity. Our life of faith is a journey, a quest to rediscover our original nature reflecting God’s intellect, emotion and will.

The best illustration of this concept I have found is in the story of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz.

Each character in this story senses that they are missing something essential. The Scarecrow doesn’t have a brain, the Tin Man longs for a heart, and the Cowardly Lion is desperate for some courage. Each of these three characters represents one of the faculties of the original mind that God intended for all of us. The Scarecrow represents intellect, the Tin Man represents emotion and the Cowardly Lion represents will.

Ultimately each will discover that they possessed these aspects of character all along. They could only find that out through their perilous journey.

Our life of faith is a hero’s journey where we are given the chance to develop these aspects of our character through the challenges we have to face and overcome.  In facing those challenges and overcoming our limitations we can grow to resemble the loving character of our Heavenly Father.
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If God exists, He has to be a personal God; He has to be like a person. As a personal God He must possess intellect, emotion and will. Based on these attributes, all His feelings and desires, and all of His goals He sets according to His will must become concrete. -CSG
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Intellect resonates with truth and emotion responds to beauty.  The  things we love become beautiful in our eyes.  Will is stimulated when we perceive righteous  actions result in a life of goodness.

To develop our intellect we study God’s Word.  Positive emotions are developed through appreciation of beauty and maintaining a grateful attitude in the midst of difficulties.  We develop our will through our investing our energies in creating a better family, society, nation and world.

Each characteristic builds upon and supports the others. Heartfelt Prayer is the practice that ties them all together. Praying about God’s Word allows the Holy Spirit to shed light on deeper levels of meaning.  Praying for the people in our lives strengthens our emotions and makes us more resilient.  Prayer helps us deal with the people we love as well as the people who get on our nerves.

This is just a brief overview of our study session from Sunday, August 28, 2011.  It’s getting a little long, so I will just leave you with the words of the Tin Woodman from the The Wizard of Oz,

“But, after all, brains are not the best things in the world.”
“Have you any?” inquired the Scarecrow.
“No, my head is quite empty,” answered the Woodman; “but once I had brains, and a heart also; having tried them both, I would much rather have a heart.”

That’s all for today.  This blog is designed as a recap of our Divine Principle discussions on Boost! Sundays.  It is also an opportunity for you to post your feedback in the comments section below.  Let me know if you have questions on the content or suggestions for improving our discussions. If you would like to delve deeper in any topic, and I will try to fit it into our schedule.

I received some interesting questions and comments with fresh perspectives from people after our class that I will try to address shortly.  I have also discovered some new scientific information about willpower that I’d like to share in an upcoming blog post.